Brian's Novel on Halong Bay

Our trip to Halong Bay begins even before we arrived to board our ship; honestly it started in the lobby of our own hotel. We were greeted in the lobby by a very nice gentleman with very good English language skills. He and An quickly became fast friends and was a wealth of information about the area around our hotel and in general as we traveled from Hanoi to Halong Bay. Not to be out done we were matched with a driver with the skills of Mario Andretti and his spacious pace car. While our guide would explain the country side our driver would expertly pass busses, trucks, and cars at high rates of speed (usually 80 kmh and above) with a nonchalant look as if this was simply practice for something more challenging to come. The road down was very deceiving as it looked very flat but was full of bumps, and apparently our pace car of a van was outfitted with the motor of a Porsche but the shocks of a farm tractor. Somehow An managed to grab a bit of sleep as she sat sleeping on my lap with her head bouncing all over my chest.

On the way to Halong Bay we stopped for about 30 minutes at a school/shop where young adults in the trade skills would make and then sell their wares. There was a variety of everything; bowl, plates, sculptures, clothes, musical instruments, toys, and a big selection of jewelry. An was upset when we made her leave the musical instrument section but was quickly placated when grandpa showed her a cat. This is the same man who would scold me for petting dogs and such in Mexico and Jamaica. An had a good time with the cat, and for the cat's part it was amazingly patient even when she would heft it around on her chest. After purchasing a couple of paintings and a bottle of water it was time to climb back in our pace car and make for the finish line.

As we came into Halong City, which is where we would disembark, the humidity was stifling. Our driver pulled into a small stall which looked like an area for herding cattle and let us out. They must have unions in Vietnam because as 3 young gentlemen helped us on to a smaller boat for shuttle 5 much older men sat on the stalled area and "supervised" from afar. Our guide went along with us and after all the passengers were loaded we shuttled out to the junk.

I must pause and explain how the shuttle docks; the driver will take off at full speed and drive pretty much straight at the intended target and 2 seconds before the impact the driver hits full reverse not unlike a cab ride in New York or Chicago. Because of this the shuttle is well equipped with 4-5 old tires at the front of the boat in order to cover any areas of impact. Once we bounce off whatever we are docking the engine is then slammed to half and left there so that the boat will stay in place (who needs ropes? ).

Anyhow we boarded our junk and prepared to head out. After putting our bags in our room we were sat down and served a five course lunch. The food was really good and An was able to get in and really make a good mess trying everything. Right after lunch we got underway and the scenery was amazing, it was not the tooth like sea spires I had expected but a collection of so many small islands that from a distance it looked like a mountain range. Our guide told us the bay contained 11,900 individual islands, most of which had resisted erosion and remained in similar condition to what they have been for centuries past. The boat pulled into a open collection of islands along with several other junk boats and our guide informed us that we were to go ashore and look at one of the bigger caves that had been discovered in one of the islands. The cave was amazing and in fact not one but 3 separate caves growing in size as we left one and went to the next. One of the most interesting things in the caves was the lighting; it was floor level movie theater style which meant the wires had to be run through the thick walls and not overhead style like most caves in the U.S. On our way out I once again retained the title of the "world's Most Terrible Dad" as An and I noisily passed the ice cream vendor on the way out of the caves. But from the sounds behind us as we descended I am sure I have a lot of competition for my title. When we got back to the boat we steamed off for about a half an hour and they we anchored and were told that we would be here for a while and swimming time was available. Because I am part Welch and as such am subject to the fair-skinned Welch gene I told Wendi I would not be going swimming in the salt water. That lasted for 2 minutes until An saw the other people on the boat frolicking in the water and made us very aware she would not miss out. I wouldn't call what we did so much swimming as much as maybe gymnastics on a life vest. Since the ship did not have a child size vest I had to don a vest and let the monkey known as An try to flip and rotate me like a gyroscope.

After swimming it was close to dinner time and time for An to test her limits with daddy. After finding out that daddy does have limits she started to get sad and began to have a meltdown. Thankfully our guide was nearby and translated what she was saying: "I want to go home, I want to go back". Unfortunately we couldn't tell her we were going back the next day in case she would take it as we would take her back to her foster family. After about a half hour of crying we sat down and had dinner. As she ate some the tears dried up and her mood became better but she was still very tired. After dinner though she got a second wind and we stayed up till 9pm finishing dinner, watching the sun go down, and watching some others on the boat try to catch Pi(small squid). When we went to bed she went right to sleep. Dad and mom were not as lucky as the bed was a flat rock slab handed down from Fred and Wilma Flintstone. Because of her meltdown and sadness we left it up to An as to where she slept and she chose to put me in between her and Wendi sleeping on the outside left. For a good portion of the night she kept herself turned toward me. Unfortunately that did not last and just as I had finally nodded off I awoke to Wendi yelling at me "she's fallen! Go get her!” An had rolled off the bed and still half asleep had not yet registered what had happened. Quickly we got her back in the center of the bed and I slept on her outside.

The morning came with An in a much better mood, and at 7am Vietnam time we had a 5 course breakfast. About an hour after breakfast we anchored off of an island and boarded the shuttle boat for a trip into a small lagoon area inside of the island. We had to go in at low tide because as the guide explained the water would raise so much during high tide that only swimming underwater could you access the same area. It was a very pretty place and could easily hide a small flotilla of speed boats immediately making me think of all the pirates and buccaneers who must have hidden out in several of the nearly 12,000 islands in the bay. After we got back there was more swimming time but we passed this time. However some of the other passengers took time jumping off of the roof and into the water(2 story or so fall). This high diving impressed An to no end and was a complete puzzle to her. We pulled anchor and headed back to Halong Harbor where once again we had another 5 course meal before departing to shore to meet up with Mario and the pace car.

On the way back, in between the white-knuckles our driver gave her, Mom decided she and dad would head for a one day trip to Sapa, a place in the north of Vietnam. So arrangements were made and when we got back to Hanoi we had dinner, came back to the hotel and mom and dad left for their trip. They left Sunday evening and should be back Tuesday morning(Vietnam days +13hours from Idaho). The train ride is 10 hours each way so if nothing else mom's Sapa post should be interesting.

As for us we weathered the night very well having a bed that is space age compared to the slab of slate we had on the boat. After having a good breakfast(a buffet is just as good as 5 courses) we were off to go and get An's health check and passport. The visit to the SOS medical clinic (yes the same one from the earlier post and same doctor luckily enough) took about 90 minutes but 70 of those minutes were waiting on people and paperwork. Tomorrow we go for her Visa which should take about 2 hours; 15 min up front of signing and then an hour and 45 minutes that we either wait in the office or go and walk around and return later. We will be choosing the later. God I love paperwork....

October

October began with An attending her friend Mollie's 3rd birthday party. An was invited to a birthday party shortly after coming home, but I don't think she really understood what was going on. For Mollie's birthday, however, it all came together and started what has become a near daily ritual. "Momma (or Bo), when An's Happy Birthday to You?" It's in May honey, we tell her. For a while, May was good enough. Then I think she learned the months in school and realized just how far away May was. Now she tells everyone who will listen that An's birthday is May 7th and she will be FIVE. She even tells you whose birthdays are happening before her birthday and is excited that the list is getting shorter.

Mollie's party was at a gymnastics place and An had a great time swinging on the ropes and jumping (or being thrown) into the foam pit. Seeing her swing on the rope brought back memories of one of the pictures we received while waiting for her...one of those that cemented in our minds that this was a tough, make your own fun kind of girl:
Hanging out in Vietnam

Hanging out in the US

Also in early October, we had to figure out how to explain Halloween to An. Hmm, you get dressed up, knock on people's doors and get candy! Thankfully at four, she really wasn't interested in the why - the promise of candy was good enough for her. However, choosing a costume was a chore. So many options: Spiderman, a Jedi Knight, Yoda, a tiger, a ride-on horse. Notice that there is not one "girly" option in there. My efforts to get her into a princess costume or anything remotely feminine were met with a resounding no! It was at this time that she started doing Yoda impersonations. She has his walk down and it is hysterical to watch.

Mid month, we went to a pumpkin farm and corn maze. She did a great job of picking out pumpkins, but her moment in the sun came when she got to ride the pony:


This girl loves horses...actually, she loves the concept of riding on things. Every time a new animal (or ficticious animal) is introduced, the first thing she says is "An going to ride ___ (insert dragon, reindeer, etc.)"

I wish I could upload a video (my program for compressing video's does not like Windows 7 so Blogger won't let me) because one evening, An treated us to what I must believe to be a Vietnamese children's song. After getting ready for bed, she came out of the bathroom and started singing loudly and dancing. She started by patting her head, then her shoulders, then her arms and on down. Words cannot describe how funny it was. The part where she sticks her bottom out and smacks it will be a source of great embarrassment in the future. I am so glad we captured it on video - both for the embarrassment factor and because it is close to the last Vietnamese she has spoken.

Towards the end of the month, I arranged a meeting with some local Vietnamese college students - they had been in the country for about the same amount of time as An and were excited to talk with her. It was very obvious that she understood everything they said to her - they would ask her a question in Vietnamese and she would respond appropriately in English. But there was no way we could get her to speak Vietnamese. We tried bribing her with candy, the promise of playing with a cell phone, but she just wouldn't do it. I am still saddened by this...it's one more loss that she has endured.

Finally...Halloween. I suppose you are wondering what she finally choose? We started with a tiger costume, but it wasn't big enough. Then we found an elephant, but that wouldn't do. Sooo...after searching long and hard (and not being able to find a Spiderman costume - but perhaps I didn't try too hard on that one) An settled on the ride on horse costume. Dad went as a doctor and me...well, I'll take any opportunity to wear leggings, a big, belted shirt, electric blue eyeshadow, eyeliner and mascara! After all, I spent formative years in eastern Idaho and if you've seen the girls in Napolean Dynamite - their big hair was nothing compared to ours!

September

Let's start with the last two weeks of August because it sets the stage for September. After returning from Yellowstone, An and I spent a good deal of time "practicing" how she would go to school. First we scheduled a visit and got to spend some one-on-one time with a few of the teachers and explore her classroom. Then, many mornings, after getting ready for the day,we would walk to her school and go out on the playground or just spend a few minutes in the empty classroom looking around. Some days we spent 15 minutes there, other days an hour. On the last day before the official start of school, An was tempted by her teacher to go outside and have an ice cream sandwich with the other kids. I boldly told her that I was going to go to the store and I'd be back in 10 minutes. I walked out of her sight and watched her walk hand in hand down the hall with her teacher. I waited the 10 minutes and went out to the playground to find that she had finished her ice cream and was playing with a dump truck in the sand. She was happy to see me and after playing for a few more minutes we headed home. Her teacher said there were no tears or signs of distress.

Then, on September 1, our beautiful An started school! I dropped her off at 8am - her teacher meeting us in the hall to reassure her. She showed us where to place An's lunch, her placemat and napkin and then led An to the art room to play for about 20 minutes before class started. At 12:30 my mother-in-law and I met at the school door and went in together. In addition to practicing going to school, we had practiced taking a nap and playing at BaBa and Ba Noi's for a few afternoons. We greeted An (or, I should say she greeted us with a smile) and we went to BaBa and Ba Noi's house where I told her that I needed to "di lam" (go back to work) and it was time for her to "go nap".

She loves school - and has not shed one tear about it. Some mornings, she will grab my legs or my hand as I am leaving and say "no, no momma!" but when I turn her face up to mine she has an enormous smile on it and I know she is playing me. She bursts into laughter and waits for one of the teachers to lead her to an activity. Most days, though, she wants to hide behind me as we enter the classroom so that she can surprise her teachers. It's a cute game that everyone plays with her. It may not be for every family but we are sold on Montessori school. The gentleness and respect that everyone shows for each other (teachers for children, children for other children and children for teachers) creates an environment that An is just thriving in.

In mid-September, we had the opportunity to join the Idaho Families with Children from Asia group for Tet Trung Thu. An and our neighbor Mollie, also adopted from Vietnam, spent the morning making their lanterns for the parade. In addition to wonderful food and people, there was also a Tai Chi lesson that An really enjoyed.



Can't say the same about the climbing wall. But this is an anomly because An spent most of the summer climbing to the the top of the climbing wall in our neighborhood park so she could sit with one leg hanging on each side...


We finished off the month with a few trips to the cabin and a visit with our wonderful friends from North-Central Idaho. Alec and An had a great time together and didn't really want to part when it was time to head home.

One final picture since it is one of my all time favorites. And in case you were wondering, its a rare moment when the girl isn't smiling.

Honesty

Today, Brian related that on the ride home from school, An told him that "momma going to be mad at An". She said "momma told An to eat all her lunchmeat before eating cookies and An ate her cookies but not all her lunchmeat." Are four year olds typically this honest? To prepare for her homecoming, I first read about the developmental stages of a two year old. Then I read about the developmental stages of a three year old. Finally, I got to stop after reading about four year olds because it turned out that we were actually going to meet our girl before she became a teenager. But its now all jumbled up in my mind - I can honestly say I didn't expect that much honesty from her!

I did tell her during dinner that I heard that she didn't eat all her lunchmeat before eating her cookies (with a smile on my face because I knew that she ate 2/3 of her lunchmeat, a bag of cherries, a load of green beans, a graham cracker and drank her chocolate milk before she ate the 3 Nilla Wafers). She replied quickly "I'm sorry momma, tomorrow I eat all my lunchmeat!". We just laughed and I told her that I was proud of her for telling the truth.

On another note, I have, honestly, been terrible about keeping up on the blog. My friend Shelby is the latest to remind me of it. Since I need to capture a "report" for each month since An has been home for her "baby" book, I am going to post for September, October, November and December in the next few days. Honestly...I'm going to!

I do have to say, in my defense, that it has been far more fun to play with An every day than post about her...

As a teaser for the December post, here's a preview of what we've been up to.

July & August with An

So it's been a little more than a week but I finally got the pictures downloaded from our trip. To make this easy on me, I'm adding them as a slideshow - just click on the photo below. An had a wonderful vacation - her only complaint was that we couldn't produce a live moose for her. For the 3 days before coming home...and just about daily since we got home, she gets out her animal identification card and says "mom - MOOSE". I had to tell her that it was very unlikely that we'd see a moose in Boise. Brian wanted to show her an elk and tell her it was a moose but I said absolutely not!